My current affirmations include:
- Eating that won’t help me with what’s on my mind
- I want to go swimming. It helps me think clearly
- I like being strong enough to go up the stairs at work without breathing hard
Rather than spending time thinking about my eating patterns and why I do or do not eat, I am providing myself with other tools to keep myself happy and doing what I want to do.
Yesterday I was stressed out at work in the morning and recognized that I was upset about emails that probably didn’t need to upset me. However, I couldn’t figure out why, so I looked at what I was doing to see what might help.
I noticed that I had chosen to listen to a German newscast in order to improve my German skills. However, I realized that due to the stress, I hadn’t heard a word. So I replaced the newscast with some favorite music and calmed down immediately.
On Wednesday I have a job interview for a job that I really want, but fear rejection. I keep slipping into the vicious circle of wanting the new job, liking the old one, fearing the feelings of rejection if I don’t get the new job, and going round and round without resolution. Facts are irrelevant to my anxiety, but here they are:
- Both jobs have exciting pluses and tiresome minuses
- The new job has a pile of old emotions associated with it that are painful to work through
- I prefer the new job
- They might not choose me because of headcount, not because of skills
- I have far and away the best skill set of the candidates for the new job
- They might also not choose me because they reject me personally (this is real, not just paranoia)
Arrgh arrgh arrgh. I don’t want to learn that I won’t get the job. I’d rather live life thinking that I could have had it if I wanted. That might be more important than actually having the new job. What the heck can that mean?
