Archive for the ‘weight loss and diets’ Category

Just a couple of days ago, I was up a kilo or more, so I was flabbergasted when I stepped on the scale today and found that I had FINALLY broke through the 300 pound barrier. I weighed in today at 299,2 pounds. This turns around a 18-year gain period that started when I got pregnant after losing down to 177 pounds.

YES, intuitive eating has enabled me to lose 65 pounds so far.

YES, it seems to be that to lose weight at a more steady pace means that I get to learn to be more comfortable with hunger.

YES, I ate at least one piece of chocolate cake every day over the weekend.

YES, I eat a piece of chocolate every day, and don’t limit myself to just one.

YES, I work on my THINKING about eating much more than I work on what I eat.

YES, I can.


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The IOWL podcast number 42 helped me better understand more about breaking through the block to intuitive eating.

Most people who read this blog have a significant amount of weight to lose. That means that, even if they are finding hunger at most meals, listening to their bodies and minds to choose the right foods, they are still not intuitively eating so that they lose the weight they want to lose. For me, the weight is trickling off, when I am rationally convinced that I can eat intuitively to lose weight faster. Somehow I never seem to consistently eat enough less to lose faster. Most of the time, I believe I find a reason to “go ahead and eat this anyway,” thereby eating more than I burn on a tiny but regular basis.

That’s where this podcast comes in. I do recommend you listen to this one if you share my issue. The meat of the podcast starts at about minute 16 and goes to minute 26. Sometimes I go into the podcasts and just listen to the best parts.

Do I have a phobia about being hungry? I know I used to have one, but I don’t think I do now. I used to think about the next meal while I was preparing or eating the first one. I could not conceive of a social situation without food, or working through stress without food to comfort me. Most of that’s resolved now.

Perhaps I have a phobia about prolonged hunger. I eat breakfast so that I’m getting hungry about 11 a.m. and we eat lunch about 45 minutes later. That makes me usually good and hungry.  But if I get hungry earlier, I start to worry, and sometimes I eat more at lunch. Yet I can’t quite seem to cut back on my portion size so that I get hungry earlier.

I really hate it when I have a mental block or a belief that I can’t identify. Clearly I have a belief that I need a certain quantity of food and fullness to be satisfired at meals, but I can’t break through it yet. There’s also a belief that I need a certain amount of food in a day to be satisfied.

Still puzzling on this one.

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Hi, I’m still around. We are on vacation and remodeling the living room. Here are before and in-the-middle pictures. I’d wondered if I would go crazy and eat everything in sight, since we normally travel during vacation, but I didn’t. It’s actually been great.

I’m doing great on intuitive eating, am even losing weight. Looks like I lost a pound since the first of August. Exercise was also easy, since we had to move over 1000 books ( we moved the bookshelf from one wall to the opposite). Many of the shelves had two layers of books in them. I’ve culled a couple of boxes of books, and moved many more down to the basement. Talk about building your arms!

As I picked through my books, I’ve decided to put away all of the eating disorder/intuitive eating books. I don’t need them now, probably don’t need them any more at all. I found my copy of Geneen Roth’s Breaking Free From Emotional Eating, which was the book that got me started so many years ago.

Before: the bookshelf is on the wall behind the door. White wallpaper with shiny spots. Yick.

In the middle: Bookshelf is behind the photographer. The left wall is a pale green in a “crumpled paper”  style. The accent wall is red in the same paper. The red will wrap around into the eating area, and the final wall will be a conforming white tone. We’re going to put an architectural-style entertainment center on the red wall. I get to buy a big screen TV!! Yay! 46 inches of LCD beauty!

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I recently watched a video about bariatric treatment (not bypass surgery) as a business. There were apparently dozens of doctors in attendance. Do you know what was odd about the video? There were many fat, possibly obese doctors.

One of the speakers in the video described his job. A couple of times he emphasized that it is a low stress, good income job, even noting how few of his patients call him after hours. He prescribes phentermine.

After 7800 patients, only 44% lose 10% of their initial body weight within the first six months. At typical body weights of 200+ pounds, that means, after paying thousands of dollars, 44% of his patients have lost over 20 pounds. That’s what he defines as good.

He also defines 200 new patients a month as good, too. I can imagine which statistic is more important to him.

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For those of us who are very large, it’s often more important to find clothes that cover us rather than look good. For a long time I bought almost anything that fit even reasonably well, because there were simply so few clothes available to me in my size.

Now, I’m a bit smaller, and my bust is 2-3 sizes smaller than my hips. For tops, I fall into the plus size category, and for bottoms, I’m comfortably into the supersize or high plus sizes. That means I can often find comfortable pants, and can always find tops to fit.

Yikes! If tops are now easy to find, I’ll go broke if I stick to my former policy of “if it fits, buy it.” Example: I wanted a hippie-style tunic top. When I found a tolerable pink one, I bought it. Later I found a couple of tops that fit better that the tunic. The last few days, I’ve been photographed in all three. The pink top simply doesn’t fit right. I even had to roll up the sleeves, and the end result is, I think I should get rid of the pink one.

Take a look at the pictures. What do you think? Keep or toss?

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FInally someone noticed my weight loss and said something about it.

My husband’s aunt lost a lot of weight a few years ago, then promptly gained it all back. Now she’s getting weaker, and few people expect her to live much longer.

Yesterday we visited her, and she came over to me to specifically mention she had noticed my weight loss. She went further to say that the last time we’d visited she noticed as well. We talked a little more about the fact that I’m doing it slowly so that I am making permanent changes, and will never have to do this again.

Knowing that someone else has noticed and was kind enough to say something has certainly helped me feel more content. It’s not my main motivation, but it certainly helps.

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This was a pleasant surprise. DH and I went to this movie this evening, just to enjoy ourselves, and I discover that the plot included a very supportive perspective on large people.

 (SPOILER alert)

First Maxwell Smart had a weight issue himself that he conquered in a highly normal way, then he used his job as a platform to notice and connect with some people of size. Very positive, very empowering.

And the movie was laugh out loud fun too. The only thing keeping me from buying it when it arrives on DVD is a single barf scene which was too gross for my delicate sensibilities.

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